Update

Picture this.

You're sitting at lunch with a friend you haven't seen in a while. You want to explain a situation about a person at work, lets call her Feisty. You want your friend in a mater of moments to know everything about the way Feisty is, her personality, what she does that bugs you, how she is bonkers etc. You wish that you could transfer all your knowledge of Feisty with a blink of an eye to your friend just so she knows what you know. It gives you a headache to even begin to explain Feisty.

Following me?

I want to give an update on what's going on in my life but it frustrates me to think of how longs its been, and I do not know where I'd begin.

But just like that lunch date with your friend, with time, you don't have to explain Feisty. Eventually your friend figures out Feisty by the clues you present her
one by one.

So that is what I will do. I will not list what has happened in a year or two. Instead, through my next entries hopefully the pieces will fall together naturally.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Lyrics or Beat?

Music has got to be one of the best things that this world has to offer. Music is not only capable of creating various and powerful emotions among all types of people, but it is also something that is loved by almost everyone.

Another great aspect to music is that sometimes there are lyrics. Words to a song can potentially create a whole new feel to what you are listening to.

I always wonder if I am more of a "lyrics person" or a "beat person". Some people are obviously more than another. A good friend of mine Jimerr is definitely a beat guy. He enjoys some good words to a song and loves great lines here and there, but what really draws him to a song, is mainly how it instrumentally sounds. One of his sisters however will read every song lyric to the music she will hear and love a song more based on what the artist has to say.

Personally, I couldn't tell you what I prefer the most. I love lyrics and will typically analyze the meaning to songs. But I also love music with a great beat, and any instrument will generally draw me in. The combination of the two can sometimes be the perfect mix. It is so satisfying to hear a story unravel within a pretty tune.

In the long run, it doesn't really matter if you are more of a "lyrics person" or a "beat person". If you are a music lover you probably understand my lack of words when I have trouble trying to describe how great it is. The best way I can explain it is like this: Music is like family to me. I can't live with out it, I rely on it, and I love it. I miss it when it's not playing and I crave it when I haven't heard it in a while.

I truly believe music can be a remedy for many emotions we go through. Right now this is the song/band that's keeping me going. Enjoy. 

Great Song


Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Winning

Here's another little something I should mention about myself.

I hate to lose more than I love to win.

This weekend my college team is playing in our conference championship tournament. We are seeded first and if we get first in the tournament we will get the opportunity to play in the NCAA tournament. So the pressure is on.

Lately I have been thinking about who I play for. I have devoted so much time to the sport that I play and I consider it a passion of mine. It is sadly what I know best and is second nature to me. I came to the conclusion that I play for four main groups. My family, my teammates, myself, and for God.

There are different reasons that fall into each category, but I suppose when it comes down to it, I play to win. I don’t always mean literally winning either. As confusing as it may seem, to me, winning can be little things. Like accomplishing what I wanted to do in a day, such as making a dinner that involves more than plain pasta with butter. Winning can be getting a sincere compliment from somebody unexpected. It can be learning something interesting about someone. Or it can be settling an argument and having that feeling of relief and ease.

So basically, I play to win for my parents, siblings, teammates, God etc. but not just in water polo. I want to win at everything and be a successful person, not only from a financial stand point but by my character as well, all so the people I care so much about can take some pride in me. It is an honor to play for others so I strive to make it an honor to have me as the competitor.

Regardless of what happens this weekend I am excited to play. Oh, and GREAT NEWS!...I will be seeing Mama and Papa Doodle this weekend for the first time in four months. Now that is winning :)

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

The Wishing Game

When the Doodle siblings are together, we tend to speak to one another in different accents. Our favorite is a British accent- easy, sounds pretty, and never gets old. My parents would laugh at us and occasionally play along. One day however, Papa Doodle asked us overheard us saying we wished we really had British accents.

Papa Doodle: "Don't wish that."

Big Doodle: "Why not?" (Obviously in British accent)

Papa Doodle then sat us down and I could tell he was going to say something "important". I was hoping it would be a cool story about the British, but instead he explained something much more unexpected.

Papa Doodle: "You shouldn't wish for things you can't have. You can never change four main things. Where you were born, what time period you are from, who your parents are, and who your family is. Do not wish to have anything different because there is nothing you can do about it. You can pretend to have a different accent and think it's cool, but don't wish for anything different than what you are given."

Me: "Whatever you say Papa Doodle!" (British accent)

I'm not sure if I actually thought about it directly after Papa Doodle told us that, but I definitely have been thinking of his little speech lately.

There are so many instances where we all wish we were different. We have all wished we were from somewhere else, had different talents, had different parents, have had more or different opportunities etc. But what Papa Doodle was trying to say to us that day, I think at least, is that we should not waste or time wishing for things we can not change. Instead, we should play with the cards we are dealt with and  call the bluffs, have patience, and try our best to win the game.

And occasionally, we should speak in British accents too.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Mind Thinking

One embarrassing and unfortunate problems of Snoodle Doodle Jr. is that she has trouble forming words when she speaks.

I don't know what it is, but I will honestly just say the dumbest, most incoherent things you will ever hear in your life.The letters clumsily rush out of my mouth and stumble into words, creating a giant mess with the sentences. Words are awkwardly running into one another or not grouping together properly. Whether it be words that I created by mushing them together unintentionally, or simply saying ridiculous sentences that don't even make sense, the words are generally not smooth when speaking orally. 

Not too long ago Koto brought me breakfast while I was still asleep. (A keeper I tell you) In the morning, my talking is probably at its weakest, which means it's the most painful to listen to. After I ate, I still lounged in bed with my eyes closed looking like I didn't have a care in the world, even though I had to be somewhere in ten minutes. After a polite first hint by Koto that I may need to get a move on, and I remained still, he suggested again I get out of bed and ready for my day. With my eyes still closed, I quickly shushed him.

Me: "Shhh I'm busy."

Koto: "Uh..you are?"

Me: "Yes, give me a second."

Koto: "What exactly are you busy doing?"

Me: "I'm mind thinking."

Solid three second pause.

Koto: "As opposed to what other type of thinking?"

He had a point. Truth is, I just said the first thought that came to mind, which clearly didn't work out in an actual sentence that one would say out loud. I went on to defend myself by explaining I was mentally picking out what I was going to wear that day, so that I didn't have to literally get out of my bed to cost anymore of my precious energy.

Fortunately for me, I didn't feel too embarrassed by my unintelligent new phrase I made up, and it has actually been a new joke between a few of my friends and I. Turns out "Mind thinking" has come up many a time in my conversations now.

Friend: "What should we do for Eureka's birthday?"

Me: "Let me mind think and get back to you."

Stuff like that.

I was always taught to guard my tongue, think before I speak etc. While this is great advice, and I agree with it on many levels, sometimes spitting out what first comes to mind has its advantages. You can get a good laugh, convey a lot of honesty, and maybe even make up a new phrase. I wonder which approach I would be better off with.

I'll have to mind think on that one.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Old Wounds

When I was a little girl, I was the type of kid that like to play outside all the time. Everyday I was out soaking up the Texas sun and playing with the neighborhood friends. Playing outdoors had its cost though. There were numerous times I would fall down or get hurt in some way, whether it be a small scratch or a bloody disaster.

Today, as odd as this may sound, I was inspecting one of my oldest and biggest scars on my right knee. I couldn't help but smile thinking of how I earned it. I was riding on my bike in Arkansas, going down a hill standing with one foot on the bike seat, the other high in the air as if I were an ice skater, while my hands were holding on to the handle bars. For a few moments I held a strong pose (and did not look as graceful as the ice skaters do mind you) but when I tried to come back down I was going too fast to hold my balance, and I fell onto the cement road. I was left with gashes, bruises, and scratches of all sorts, and the biggest mark made was on my right knee.

That tumble down the hill was years ago and the scar, which once was about the size of my knee, is smaller and has faded to where it is barely noticeable.

Lately I have been picking at old wounds. The problem is, the wounds are still fresh and haven't had time to heal like the scar on my knee has. They are not wounds that are barely detectable at first glance, but wounds that still have color to them. Injuries that I have experienced within a year.

Although I am dating and love my boyfriend Koto, I still have had trouble with my ex, Deedle. Whenever I am home, and I happen to run into him, we attempt to be civil. We say our pleasantries and move on. The problem is, my wound with Deedle is still young. No, it's not fresh and my love with Koto has been like ointment to my injury, but it still feels as if someone is attempting to reopen that wound which I have waited what has seemed so long to heal. It is not like I still love Deedle or that I want to be with him. I just feel that bitterness between us and it simply makes me sad.

Another wound that is fresh and will still continue to bleed occasionally is my dear friend Mr. Don, who is no longer here. I know this will simply take time, but every now and then something probes that wound and I feel like it will never stop bleeding.

The good news is, like the injury on my knee, these wounds will heal and become scars. Scars are a funny thing.  At first you hate the wound, you are hurt and upset. Some take more time then others, but eventually we almost forget it's there. A scar starts to take place, and there are those moments where you stare for minutes, memorizing the shape while you think of how it all began. Then, some scars you barely notice, and if you do it's just a part of who you are. It will always be there and you learn to accept that.

Our wounds are how we learn, and reopening them is how we grow even if that's difficult. Our injuries and problems come with each passing year, and we use that experience to move forward into the new year.

Looking back on 2011, I experienced wounds that I can't help but flinching a little still when I think about them. But I will use all of the pain and hurt I had to prepare for the new year.

So, 2011 I believe a thanks is in order...you gave me some heartache and trouble, but you also gave me great blessings. I have fallen in love, gotten a better idea of what I want to do in life, gotten closer to my loved ones, and learned several lessons that I will keep with me always.You have prepared me for next year and the ones following.

Farewell 2011, I move forward and anticipate the arrival of 2012. One day you will be remembered as the year that left me with old wounds.


Until Next Time,


Snoodle Doodle Jr.

So Long Dear Friend

Mr. Don is officially out of this world. He died December 12th, and I fortunately was able to make it to his funeral. It was a beautiful service at the Veterans funeral home, but it was also the saddest thing I've ever been to. He would have loved it though.

At the end of the service several people I hadn't seen in a while came up to talk to me. We reminisced about Mr. Don and how great he was, and it made me realize how impacting of a person he was. To many, it may seem he was just your typical southern man that liked to hunt, fish, and drink beer. But he was such an amazing friend and all who knew him loved him.

His wife also spoke to me at the end of the service and asked if I come by her house before I go back to school to pick up a present I gave him when I was a little girl. It was a small sculpture of a mountain man, since that's what Mr. Don always thought he was. He said he was born a hundred years too late. She told me he wanted me to have it. His granddaughter who I use to play with all the time, gave me a yellow rose that was placed on the casket, and we exchanged a hug and a look but no words were spoken.

The only person who I didn't know that spoke to me after the funeral was the funeral director. She told me that Mr. Don and his wife spoke highly of me and I was brought up several times. She also said Mr. Don viewed me as a daughter.

His funeral, the people and their words, and that yellow rose all about broke my heart. There are random moments where I just start to tear up, even at the most unusual times. I know he wouldn't want me to be sad, and he'd want me to go on and live up my Christmas holidays but it is so difficult. I just miss my friend.

Life will continue on though, and the best I can do is make him proud. I think of him in heaven, happy and singing with his friendly southern drawl making all sorts of friends there. And even though there is no beer in heaven, I'll pretend he's sitting back with a can in his hand and smiling down on me.

So long Mr. Don, I love you and will always miss you.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

The Good Books

One of the best things ever, is when the book that you are currently reading is so good that you don't want to do anything else but read it. You read it at work, you read it during class, you take it to you wherever you go even though you know you won't be able to read any of it. That book that you stay up reading at night when you had a long day and you're exhausted, have another early morning and long day ahead of you, but you still continue to stay up in the dim light and read.

I haven't had one of those books in a while I feel. Maybe it's because I don't read as often as I use to, and I don't have as much opportunity to get many of those good books. Even still, I haven't read a good solid book in a while. It has left me feeling grumpy,antsy, and I can't wait to get my hands on one.

I'm missing the good books. Fingers crossed, I'll get a hold of one soon.


Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Our Things

Every person has their own "thing" or two that, without it, they have trouble functioning.

Take Big Doodle for example. If he does not write, he literally gets stressed out. Grouchy, antsy, nervous even. His "thing" that he can't do without is writing.(No exaggeration)

Mama Doodle's "thing" is reading. Without a good ol' book to read before bedtime, Mama Doodle probably could not fall asleep (No exaggeration)

Little Doodle's "thing" that she can't do without is a literal item. Her cell phone. She not only would cry without her little baby, but crawl to her room and cry herself to sleep. (Maybe a little exaggeration)

Snoodle Doodle Jr. has a few "things" I suppose, but the main one is working out. If I do not work out I get anxious, cranky, moody, annoyed, you name it. I have certainly gotten better over the years I will say, mainly because I don't have as much time to work out, and my body has adjusted to it. A few years ago, I would toss and turn at night when I did not get exercise. I was in a sport all my life, and in high school my main sports were waterpolo and swimming. With sports, working out was obviously part of the job, so I would kill two birds in one stone during practice- I would get my work out in so I could ease my nerves, and I would get better at my sport. Now that I'm in college I still play a sport, but in the off season we are not allowed as many hours as we were in high school. This means every other type of exercise we wish to do, we must do on our own.(No exaggeration)

This past Thanksgiving break, although amazing in so many ways, I did not do a lick of exercise. I went five days without working out in any sort of way or form. Now, I may sound whiny and all, but this has left me with so much anxiety and jitters that is hard to explain. Thinking back on it, it was my own fault and I should have gotten off my lazy butt and done something productive.

Then again, I think sometimes we do need a break from our little "things" that we rely on so much. Yes, it is good to work out,read, or write. But it is also good to sit back and focus on other perspectives in life. Like a family who I don't get to see but every six months, and loves me so much. Or my boyfriend who was accepted and well liked by my parents who can be hard to please.

And it is nice, sometimes, and only sometimes, to not work out and instead relax. To not move for a moment and just think of all the good in life. No exaggeration.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

November The Weird With Many Beards

The month of November is a strange one. It could just be from my perspective, but it's pretty darn weird.

Personally, this will be a month of much writing. The NanoWrimo began November 1st. It is an organization where an individual will write a novel of atleast 50,000 words in 30 days and 30 nights. This will be my first time trying to win. To win, one must just complete the thing, there isn't an actual prize of the best books picked out or anything. So far I haven't been doing so hot. I've got a little less than 4,000 words and I should be going at a pace of 1,667 a day. But maybe I will have a comeback.

I also just so happen to have two major research papers due this month, as well as other smaller papers for classes, and an occasional article I will write for my school newspaper. Like I said, just a lot of writing this month for me. I do not mean this to complain, more like a venting sort of thing.

The other strange thing about the start of November is "No shave November" which is where men will let their beards grow out for the whole month with a shaggy, manly look for men's cancer awareness. Already I can begin to see who will be participating in this event.

November also holds the day of my birth. Here's the thing about my birthday though...generally people will be slightly excited for their birthdays. Me on the other hand, I get anxious and dread the day. Weird, random, usually not-so-great stuff happens on my birthday. Like I said, weird November.

Koto's birthday is in November too, but this I am actually looking forward to. I have some pretty big plans for him, and fingers crossed, they will all work out smoothly and he will be happy.

I will be going home to visit my family in the south for Thanksgiving at the end of the month. This is a little different too, seeing as last year I didn't get to go down. But that's not the only difference...Koto will be coming with me. Yep...Koto is going to meet the Doodle family. I'm not sure why I thought it was such a great idea but I guess its better sooner than later? He's going to have to see how crazy they all are at some point. Luckily he's a good spirit and will excuse their odd ways.

November is just weird to me. And full of beards.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Happy Halloween!

It was quite the Halloween weekend. On Friday night I was Robin....

On Saturday night Koto and I were Tyler Durden and Marla Singer from the movie "Fight Club"

Then on Sunday night-last night-one of my housemates, Eureka, was Fred Flintstone and I was Pebbles.

I kind of went all out. I can't decide if I should be proud or embarrassed.

Hope everyone has a safe Halloween!

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Confession Booth

It is time for me to confess a few things.

1. I confess that I want to be a writer. I don't know what kind exactly, but it would be so amazing to be a TV writer or just to write a novel. The catch? I don't want to write crap. Even if I had a great opportunity, I don't think I'd go through with it if my work was trash. I'd much rather have some dignity and respect.

2. I confess that my own governor pisses me off. Don't get me wrong, I agree with a lot of his views. I really do. BUT....he embarrasses me. He honestly truly embarrasses me. In philosophy class my professor- who is a complete socialist- always makes fun of Perry, and will always ask my input. I try to defend my governor on some levels, but it is becoming pretty difficult. I really think the man means well, he just becomes too extreme and scares people away with how he expresses his views.

3. I confess that every time a person doesn't hold the door open for me- when they clearly are supposed to-I think less of them. Maybe they were in a rush? Maybe they didn't see me? No. I don't even give them an excuse, I just get annoyed. Call this judgmental, because that's what I'm going to call it, I can't help it. These people always make me cringe.

4. I confess that I had a crush on Shia LaBeof....when he was on the Disney Channel playing in Even Stevens. All my friends made fun of me, but I stood firm. He was my childhood crush which I am not ashamed of. Well, okay maybe I could have chosen someone a little more "hunky" if you will, but I can't change who I thought was cute when I was eleven years old. So Shia it is.

5. I confess that when I'm in a car going by a cemetery, and people hold their breath, I only pretend to hold my breath. I don't actually participate. 

6. I confess that I think too much about the past. It's definitely an issue and something I gotta work on. I dwell on my past mistakes more than I focus on my future.

7. I confess that when I began writing this post, the thought that it may be slightly sac religious went through my head, but I went on writin' it.

Maybe I will actually go to a confession booth soon.

Alright, alright...I confess that I'm not Catholic.

This confession will just have to suffice.


Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

A Day in a Life of Big Doodle

Big Doodle has a basic schedule.

He wakes up, paces, eats, paces, pets the dogs, paces, reads, paces, writes, paces, thinks, paces, and repeat.

There are only a small few times that this routine will be interrupted. When Papa Doodle or another family member will intertwine their plans with Big Doodle. For example, when Mama Doodle wants to go grocery shopping and needs someone to lift the dog food into the basket, Big Doodle will come along, and he will be happy to be of help.

Another time is when Big Doodle has a medical appointment of some kind.

The last way is the most interesting. It is when those really random and unpredictable events occur.

Last Wednesday is a perfect example.

Big Doodle was supposed to turn in a volunteer form to a rehabilitation center around the corner from our home down south. I had called him around noon to make sure he was going to turn it in, and give him a few words of encouragement. After a few minutes of walking him through what he should wear and how he should present himself, we hung up.

About an hour later I get a phone call from him, so I was expecting it to be about the volunteer situation.

Me: "Hello?"

Big Doodle:  "I'm very concerned."

Me: "About what? Did you turn that form in? I swear if you didn't..."

Big Doodle: "No, no. I'm feeling anxious about something else. The cats were attacking a bird in the back yard."

This was not exactly uncommon seeing as we have about six cats in our household- yes, we are crazy- so I didn't see the problem.

Me: "Okay...so what happened to the bird?"

Big Doodle: "I saved it."

Me: "You what? What do you mean you saved it? It survived?"

Big Doodle: "Well, it's injured. I ran out and saved it."

Me: "Wait, wait, whatever you do, don't touch the bird!"

Big Doodle: "S#*t! Oh God! Am I going to die!?"

Me: "Calm down, everything is fine. Where is the bird now?"

Big Doodle: "It's in my hat...in my room"

I couldn't help but laugh. The situation was so typical for the Doodle family, and so ridiculous. After clear instructions to Big Doodle to take the bird in his hat to the garage- without touching the bird itself- to go and thoroughly wash his hands, arms, and face I told him to just sit tight until Mama Doodle came home.

It is so funny to picture my brother, so innocent and kind, running in our backyard, and charging at his own cats to save a bird that he's never seen before. His intentions are always so pure. I love Big Doodle so much, more than he even knows.

To some, it may seem like Big Doodle needs me. Yeah, maybe he needs me to direct him in a fashion sense, and to be his support, but I need him more than he needs me. Sometimes I feel like I'm that bird that's being attacked, and just torn apart by what the world throws at me. Then there's Big Doodle to my rescue, knowing he may get a scratch himself in the process, but saves me anyway.

That's what big brothers are for. For those who don't have one of your own, I hope you have some sort of substitute. Because honestly, having a loving older brother is one of the greatest blessings anyone can ever have.

Even if he does call you in panic randomly because there's a bird that pooped in his hat after he saved it.


Until next time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr. 

New Discoveries

Today is Columbus Day- the anniversary of the day Christopher Columbus discovered the Americas. 

This weekend I did some searching and discovering of my own. I went with Koto to his home to visit his family. He grew up in a state cheering for the Redskins and the Capitals, meanwhile only miles away from where America's President sleeps.

The past few days may not have been as eventful as the days that Columbus was sailing the ocean blue, but it was enough to leave me feeling as tired as any sailor would.

There are three significant discoveries I made within the past few days.

1.) I really like hockey. Koto and his long time friend Peru bought the three of us Capitals tickets. This was essentially my first time to ever watch a hockey game, and between the fans and the watching the intense game unfold, I was hooked.  The Capitals came out with a nice win (although a little shaky at first) and it was a nice way to top off my first official hockey game.

2.) Arguments are only worth it if they are productive. Yeah, maybe I already understood that this is how arguments should be, but the thing is, most of the time fights are usually not like that. Koto and I had a few arguments this weekend, and even though they weren't necessarily our first fights, there was something significant about them. I can be pretty feisty or aggressive when I argue, and I do this awful thing where I say anything I can just to make the other person feel bad about themselves. Just from the experiences with past relationships, I have gotten away with this, but all it took was for Koto to calmly tell me I was being mean. Something so simple, but so effective somehow. After that, we worked through our little pickle and I felt better than I had before.

3.) I'm smitten. Yeah, I have loved Koto for quite some time now, but after three days with him non-stop and no break, I'm not sick of him in the least. In fact, I miss and love him more. We drove a total of 612 miles this weekend and the entire time we talked, sat in comfortable silence, or just listened to the music playing. He is so brilliant, special, and kind, I am amazed how he is satisfied with me.

All in all, I discovered a new sport that I enjoy, I accepted a fault of mine and look forward to improving my arguing methods, and most importantly, I discovered that I am just as smitten with a guy who claims to be smitten with me.

As far as I'm concerned, Columbus can keep his credit on the Americas. Pshh, what Columbus, you think you are so important because you discovered land that years later became an amazing country, and eventually developed into a nation full of powerful and important people? Take it. I got something better. I found myself a keeper.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Mr. Don

A few days ago I received some distressing news. Mr. Don, a good family friend from home has stage 4 colon cancer.

Mr. Don lived down the street from my family in our old neighborhood, before we moved a few miles away into a different home. I have knows him since I was seven or eight and his granddaughter and I use to play with each other every weekend that she came down to visit.

The three of us would go out to his parent's pier and fish every weekend, but sometimes it was just the two of us. We use to always ride our bikes around the neighborhood or to the park, and I have so many memories that I can still see today. I wrote him a poem that I am sending down south. It's pretty amateur and sounds kind of childish, but I just want him to know how much he means to me.

Teachin’ Baby Girl to Fish

Saturday night out on the pier

Me with my coke, you with your beer.

Here we go with our poles and our bait

“Cast the line out Baby Girl, then just sit back and wait.”

You catch a Flounder on your very first try

Not one bite for me- the fish swim on by.

We relax in silence and stare at the silver moon

“Night time fishin’s the best Baby Girl, don’t worry, you’ll catch one soon.”

A tug on my line makes me jump up and scream

I reel that thing in like it’s my biggest dream.

But the line becomes lighter; I hang my head in shame and dismay

“I’m sorry Baby Girl, it seems that one got away.”

There’s another tug on your line- this one seems big!

But my empty hook needs more bait, so I open the bag of shrimp and dig

I pick the best one I can find,

“I’ll put it on the hook Baby Girl, hold on if you don’t mind”

But, oh no, miss prissy me

I can do it myself, you just wait and see.

Your huge fish plops down on the deck, but you stop dead once you see all that red

“Dag nabbitt, Baby Girl did you hear a word that I said?!”

My thumb was bleeding, it got pierced by the hook

You rush to my side as the big fish is floppin’, and gah lee that deck sure shook

You wrap up my pain in an old dirty rag

“Sorry Baby Girl, it’s either this or that smelly shrimp bag.”

I feel better already with Mr. Don there

But then I’m scared once I see that fish flop right off that dang pier.

The guilt is overwhelming once I hear your big heavy sigh

“Shh it’s okay Baby Girl, no need to cry.”

Through my tears, I’m surprised to see you smile

A fish like that won’t come by for quite a while.

You kiss my forehead and pat down my hair

“Baby Girl, always remember that life just ain’t fair.”

You want me to try again, at least one more time

I pick out the shrimp, and you put it on my line

I bring the pole back, and then fling it forward, determined for a fish to be caught.

“There you go Baby Girl, that’s the perfect spot.”

We wait and wait- gee this sure is hard

I’m secretly jealous when you catch your third

I stare at the water, wishing for that bite

“Be patient Baby Girl, hand on tight.”

Then there it was! I pulled hard, but boy was it rough

Good thing this little girl was tough

I reel that sucker in with all that I have left.

“Great job Baby Girl, be sure to catch your breath!”

You unhook it and almost gut it, but I want to set it free

I don’t know why, but the fish reminds me of me.

It’s small and it’s feisty, with so much spirit

“Whatever you want Baby Girl, if you wish, we can spare it.”

Off it goes back into that bay

Maybe someone else will catch it one day.

The little girl was sleepy, it was getting pretty late

“Let’s head home Baby girl, besides, we done out of our bait.”

Dozin’ off in your truck not aware how much this memory will one day stick,

Many years later when you become so very sick.

When you dropped me off, I can hear the words to this day,

“Goodnight  Baby Girl, I love you. Good job fishing today"

I go inside and curl into bed

Dritin’ to sleep, I think of your soft kiss on my forehead.

Quite some years later, I promise to keep in touch as I head off to school

“It’s no big deal Baby Girl, you’ll be too busy, I’m not some fool.”

Please know that memories of us are so very vivid

You are the person who taught me to be strong, and to never be timid.

We may not fish together again like I so badly wish,

But I will sure always remember, who taught Baby Girl how to fish.

There are so many moments I will always keep close to heart. The time that I fell on my bike when riding by myself and Mr. Don was pulling on the street in his truck and came to my rescue. Or the time he got the splinter out of my foot and I wouldn't let anyone else touch it but him. And the time I wanted to run away from home, and when I was walking past his house in my ratty pink nightgown with my small bag, he stopped me and convinced me to stay and chat for a bit before I decided to run off forever. We sat on the back of his pick up talking away and ,before I knew it, I chose to just go back home because I was hungry anyway.

The memories like those are the ones that just make me want to curl into a ball and try to relive them in my head. When he told me the news on the phone, and I told him I was coming home for Thanksgiving, my heart just about broke when he said, "Alright Baby Girl, I'll try to hang around until then." 

Well Mr. Don, I pray to God that you do. 

Until next time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

The Nudist on the Stairwell

Tonight was quite the night for the Nee Nees.

As you may know, I babysit for the Nee Nees- three kids that can be a handful, but always an entertainment. There was an event held at the house with caterers, a large amount of important adults, and a nice sound system.  The kids were even more energetic than usual because of all the excitement.

When they were eating dinner in the kitchen, I gave the three of them orange cream soda to keep them occupied while I went scavenging for anything they may eat from the large amounts of food in the other rooms. As I was piling on little pigs-in-a-blanket, and large amounts of cheese (there was no way the kids would eat any of the other foods) I got curious glances at the dressed up adults who were digging into the shrimp. Who was this random girl dressed like a sweaty hobo stacking her plate with a bunch of covered sausages and cheese cubes?

While eating, several of the guests came into the kitchen to get a good look at the house. The Nee Nees are blessed with a beautiful home and it is hard not to roam around and explore. The Nee Nee children, being the social squirts that they are, made sure to tell each and every person who came in that they were drinking orange cream soda, and insisted to demonstrate how loud they can burp from it. Most of the spectators laughed or said something lame like, "Wow, excuse you!" with a joking tone. There was one snooty woman in particular though, that after a unhelpful comment from her part, scowled at me before she left the room. I turn to Smarty and instead of getting mad or embarrassed, I kiss him right on the top of his head.

Me: "Great burp Smarty! I think that was your best one yet." He gives me a big open smile and I can see the orange fizz in his mouth.

Once it was time for bed the kids were going bonkers. Sissy was in the family room upstairs away from everyone trying to do her math homework while I was trying to get her little brothers tucked in for the night. Smiley rips off his diaper immediately and swings it in big circles before throwing it high into the air. Thank the Lord I have good reflexes and dodged that thing before it landed right in front of me.

Here was my situation. Smiley was running around their room without any clothes on and I noticed he grabbed a large beaded necklace that the family got in summer vacation over seas. He puts it on his neck and the necklace goes past his belly button. As he was racing in circles, I was trying to get Smarty's shirt off over his head so we can put his PJ's on.

Then, I heard the crowd of people downstairs much more clear than I had a moment ago. I had shut the door when the boys and I first came into their bedroom, and it was definitely not this loud sounding. I glanced over quickly to the boy's bedroom door and to my despair, see that the door is wide open and Smiley is no longer in the room.

This means that Smiley is butt naked somewhere in the large house and there are guests downstairs that can potentially see him. I will tolerate orange cream soda burps on occasion...but I will not tolerate naked three year olds posing for a Morocco necklace to a group of important adults.

I sprint out the room and ahead I see Smiley on the top of the ornate stairwell that leads down to the front door of the entire house. The guests by now had gathered in the foyer downstairs by this very door and the dining room nearby. Basically, if anyone does anything as to glance up, they will see Smiley, stark naked on the Stairwell. I cautiously move toward him as if he were a ticking time bomb.


Scene of the crime...

Me: "Smiley, please come over here. Let's go pick out a book to read."

It doesn't work though.Smiley just gives me a mischievous smile and looks down below at all the guests downstairs. By this time Smarty is right behind me on the floor laughing at how funny his brother looks, and this only encourages Smiley further ,who had unfortunately begun to dance. I saw him inching down the first step.

I knew there was no way I could get Smiley by persuasion before he would run down the stairs and greet the crowd. I had to act fast.  I literally charged at Smiley, scooped him up, and ran back to the safety of his room. Smarty followed and closed the door like the smart little guy he is. Inside, we all tumbled to the floor-me mainly because I was out of breath- Smarty and Smiley were laughing hysterically.

I couldn't help it. I just laughed right along with them. The absurdity of the entire situation was so funny, and the fact that little naked baby caused all of this, made it that much more ridiculous to me.

After the boys were tucked in, read a story, and given their kisses goodnight, I spent a good deal of time with Sissy on her math homework. She was "slap happy" as we call it, so it was a tedious process for her to do all 24 of her problems, but she eventually got through it all.

Although it may seem ironic, the Nee Nee children help keep me sane. Even those nights that there is a nudist on the stairwell.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

The Big Ol' Heart of Football

I grew up in a state where football is up on the scale next to God and the Republican Party. Papa Doodle was a high school football and baseball coach when I was a little girl, so I have vivid memories of being dragged to a practice or games occasionally.Up until the age of about 12 we only had one TV in the entire house, and it was just a well known fact in the Doodle household that Papa had the TV on Sundays, Monday Nights, and sometimes Thursdays.

You would think that being surrounded by football, I would love the sport and be knowledgeable in it.. The honest truth is that I'm really not at all. Now, I probably know more than the average American female, but coming from the state that I am, and the Papa who raised me, I don't know diddly squat. The thing is, those days when Papa Doodle had the TV I was bitter we had to listen to the obnoxious commentators and the roar of the fans, instead of my precious cartoons. Football was inevitably around me always. When we would visit Meme and Papaw Doodle, you can guarantee you'd hear a "How bout them Cowboys?" coming from one of my uncles. If anything, being surrounded so much by the sport made me want to avoid it all together.

Fortunately for my football IQ, it was almost a social expectation to attend the high school football games that were at my town's stadium- our prized possession. Through middle school and high school I would have been spotted on a Friday night among the crowd of the town, and I grew to enjoy the sport more during these times because I understood the game more and I was hanging out with all my friends. There even came a few instances where I would watch college games with Papa Doodle on our TV, and when I would make a comment or even mention a name, Papa Doodle unglued his eyes from the screen for a moment to give me a small surprised looked.

So these days I've had Koto on my hands, and he is on top of NFL, and apart of a fantasy football league with his friends like many other guys this time of year. One thing I like about Koto is he is the type of person that wants you to learn and know as much as possible. He doesn't even realize it but he loves to express his knowledge (and not in a boastful way whatsoever) just for the fact that everyone around him will know it as well. That being said, Koto has been giving me a crash course on the National Football League, and I am proud to say I am doing pretty well in it so far. I find myself looking forward to the outcome of games, or following the teams I like.

This upcoming weekend I'm excited for my Texans against the Saints, and I am interested to see how Romo plays against those Redskins. For the first time, I feel apart of this League and I can really appreciate all the work and energy that goes into it from all sides. From the players, to the coaches, the media, and the adoring fans, there is such love and devotion to this sport. I kind of wish that I came to this realization when I was living back home, where there is such support system for it.

There is something so beautiful about an enormous amount of people who have this devotion to a sport. And, yeah, they may not think it is as pretty as I do, but maybe deep down, all of the football lovers know how special this community really is.

Until Next Time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Movin' On

Sometimes I think we all need a little push to move on. At this very moment I don't feel any support in any way whatsoever. Don't you hate that when you don't need anyone or anything it's all there right in front of you, but when you need it most you feel completely alone. I write this as a symbol of my time of confusion and frustration, my will to move forward, and my hope that everything is just going to work out in the end.

I believe that we don't always have to explain everything. Things can actually be expressed with few words. So today, I just want all to know I'm only going to be stronger for moving on this way.

Just writing that down was the push I needed.

Until next time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.

Give it up to God

Today my favorite watch broke.

Well, actually it's my only watch (was) and it isn't even that nice. I got it for $15 at Target one day last year and wear it all the time. (wore)  I took it off when I went to go workout today and accidentally dropped it on the tile floor and it just broke. Just like that, my beautiful watch that I wore faithfully broke. I find myself glancing at my bare wrist and feel embarrassed for it because it is so naked now.

I was still bitter on my walk home from the gym when I thought about something Mama Doodle taught me. She said everything you have-it can be a physical item, a friendship, or a trait you have yourself- you "give it up" to God.

I learned this lesson one morning when I dropped Mama Doodle's favorite sugar bowl when I was trying to put sugar in my coffee. The small bowl matched perfectly with our grape themed kitchen and I knew how much she liked it. I was scared she would get on to me but I knew I had to be honest. So when she came into the kitchen a few minutes later I told her the truth.

Me: "Mama Doodle I accidentally broke your favorite sugar bowl! I'm so so so so sorry! I'll do the dishes for a week!"

To my surprise she just laughed.

Mama Doodle: "That's okay honey it's not a big deal."

But it was a big deal. She talked about that sugar bowl all the time and I remember how happy she was when she found it at Kholes one day.

Me: "Are you sure?"

Mama Doodle: "Yes, but if you want to do the dishes then by all means go right on ahead."

She then went on to explain that everything she gets, she gives it up to God. That way it's His and she doesn't have to worry about it anymore. She said that she doesn't want to be attached to materialistic things or be too worried about what she looks like all the time. So everything she once had now belongs to God. I thought this was pretty impressive because quite honestly I am very possessive of my food and books, and I have trouble imagining giving those up to anyone.

Mama Doodle: "What's something physical that you like about yourself?"

I hate questions like these even if it is only Mama Doodle.

Me: "I guess I like my hair." (at the time my hair was frizz free ringlet curly and not the uncontrolled mess that it is today)

Mama Doodle: "Well give it up to God then. That way if it gets taken away from you, you won't be as upset about it."

This was not only way over my head, but it almost brought me to tears thinking of someone cutting off my hair or something crazy like that.

Eventually I did grasp the concept of giving things up to God and it made me a happier and more care free person. Sometimes I forget to give things up to Him, and maybe that's why my watch broke today- to remind me to be less attached to materialistic items like a $15 watch and more focused on Him.

Or maybe it was just His way of saying it's time for a more sophisticated looking watch.



Until next time,

Snoodle Doodle Jr.